MAN ABOUT TOWN

It's long been said that the difference between a straight man and a gay man is six beers (and perhaps a back-rub). Here, at last, is scientific proof!

I'm drawing to the end of my third week hosting 3RRR's Breakfast show, and I have to say, I'm loving it! Getting up around 4am is still killing me, and consequently I've been taking a 2-4 hour nap every afternoon, but I'm definitely getting into the rythym and routine of doing a 3-hour radio show every morning. I'm also getting some great feedback from listeners (as indicated by some of the feedback on this very blog, as well as some lovely, generous phonecalls). Still, when it all wraps up at the end of January and I get to hand the reigns back over to Fee B, Willow and Spang, I won't regret it! * * * * * Survived Christmas just fine, despite all my initial concerns. Having mum there to take the heat off worked a treat - especially as she slightly over-indulged and I spent part of the afternoon looking after her: making sure she was drinking enough water, sobering her up with a strong black coffee, etc. Consequently I didn't have time to get into any po...

In no particular order, they are: Bang Bang Rock & Roll – Art Brut [Fierce Panda/Shock] Simple, sharp chords reminiscent of The Buzzcocks or The Fall coupled with semi-chanted lyrics from vocalist Eddie Argos. Art Brut this year were London’s answer to Franz Ferdinand. Self Titled – Clap Your Hands Say Yeah [independent] This delightful album skipped, jumped and twirled through 12 tracks of exuberant indie-pop, referencing artists as diverse as Talking Heads and Tom Waits without sounding contrived. Takk… - Sigur Rós [EMI] The fourth album from post-rock quartet Sigur Rós was simultaneously more vigorous and less bleak than its predecessor, 2002’s ( ) ,and with its moments of transcendent, tear-inducing beauty, recalled their 2000 breakthrough album Agaetis Byrjun . Outside Closer - Hood [Sensory Projects/Inertia] Imagine the organic electronica of Pretty Boy Crossover fused with the bleaker moments of Art of Fighting, with just a hint of Portishead thrown in for good measure, and...

My mum's homemade shortbread, made from the recipie her mother used, which brings back memories of being dwarfed by kitchen benches, being at eye level with adult's knees, drinking red cordial, and oh, the lolly-jar that was only bought out when I'd been good. Then there was the Christmas I was given a jumbo-sized package of Smarties, ate them all in one sitting, and vomitted rainbow-colours shortly afterwards. Wherever you are, I hope it's a stress-free day. Currently lounging about at home in Fitzroy, and calling a taxi to take us out to Epping in half an hour...

Christmas is not my favourite time of year, although I've mellowed towards it as I've got older. Back in the late 1980's and early 90's I actually boycotted it for quite a while, for a number of reasons, ranging from my then-idealistic stance towards religion and capitalism, to an unfortunate reaction by my Mum soon after I came out, years ago. She told me that my grandfather would be unhappy with me bringing a partner home for Christmas (which I read as her being uncomfortable with the idea). Fine, I said, then I just won't come home for Christmas at all; and I didn't, for at least five or six years. During this phase of my life I also refused to give Christmas presents. No I wasn't being cheap; it was a stance - admitedly a slightly pretentious one! - in reaction to the consumer frenzy which Christmas has become; and wherever possible I tried to give back any presents I received (an act which one year greatly upset my late paternal grandmother), while a...

Ang Lee’s Brokeback Mountain is the most important gay film in decades, argues Richard Watts Despite being a life member of the Melbourne Queer Film Festival, and a paid-up member of the Australian Film Critics Association, I can’t remember the last time – indeed any time – that a love story about a 20-year relationship between two men has generated as much buzz as Ang Lee’s forthcoming Brokeback Mountain . That’s because it’s never happened before. The hype around this so-called ‘gay cowboy movie’ was immediate once its stars were announced: Australian actor Heath Ledger and Jake Gyllenhaal ( Donnie Darko ). With the Oscars now only a few months away, the buzz is becoming deafening. Already the film has won the prestigious Golden Lion at the Venice Film Festival, and been awarded Best Picture, Actor and Director by the New York Film Critics Circle. It is widely tipped for similar success in the upcoming Golden Globes, perceived by many in the film industry as an indicator of which wa...

I was lucky enough to interview Captain Paul Watson this morning: me sitting in a comfortable RRR studio in East Brunswick; him on the sattelite phone live from Antarctica, where his ship, the Sea Shepherd Conservation Society flagship Farley Mowat , is hunting Japanese whalers with the aim of blocking, obstructing and generally disrupting their illegal activities. The Japanese ships are hunting fin and humpback whales in the Southern Ocean Whale Sanctuary, in direct breach of international law (these two whale species are protected under the Convention on Trade in Endangered Species of Flora and Flora ); and our government, and countless others, are turning a blind eye. As well as violating the Sanctuary, the Japanese ships are violating the International Whaling Commission moritorium on commercial whaling . Consequently, the Sea Shepherd flagship Farley Mowat will do their best to draw international attention to, and disrupt where possible, the whaling ships, in conjunction with tw...

After a late night at Q + A , I was up early in order to be at my friend Glen's place in Northcote by midday. He wanted us all there by 11am, so we could get away by 12, but I didn't understand the fuss for leaving so early, and stalled a little (for which I now apologise profusely - next year I want to get away as early as possible in order to get a good campsite!). Eventually we met, we prevaricated, we packed, and eventually we got underway in the 12-seater Budget minivan that Glen had hired. Talk about organised! After much music and laughter (and a couple of beers on the road, or ciders in my case) we stopped for a late lunch in Ballan, and then at about 4.30pm we turned onto the dusty road which led to the Merdith Music Festival site, a farm about 2 & 1/2 hours outside Melbourne. We also hit a queue of traffic that was banked up a fair way, but it wasn't long before we were inside, and setting up our campsite, nicknamed 'the Northcote Social Plaza'. By r...

10.26am on Monday night and I'm absolutely fucking exhausted. I had a huge, magnificent, wonderful time at the Meredith Music Festival on the weekend, and promise a full update soon. In brief, the Friday night Bollywood Extravaganza , the Saturday night set from Sons and Daughters (Scotland) and Sunday's Meredith Gift (the best nudie-run in the world!) were among the highlights. Huge thanks and hugs to my lovely mate Glen for organising our transport: the homo-bus of love (well, there were two straight people and seven gay guys, but the straights were honorary queers for the weekend anyway). Great to spend more time with guys like Cam and Andrew and Darren, and much fun meeting and becoming friends with Anna and Rob. Despite the weekend's debauchery I was up at 4am today, after about 5 hours sleep, preparing for my first Summer Breakfasters fill on RRR from 6-9am. Worked at the station til 12, came home, had lunch, caught up with Damien at Melbourne Fringe, then back hom...

My face is back to its normal size, my black eye has faded to almost nothing, and I'm feeling good. Thanks to all for their messages of support and concern, which came from as far away as London, and from unexpected quarters. I've often wondered just how many people read my blog, and from the numerous comments made about my last post, it would seem that there's quite a lot of you! In other news, I'm off to the Meredith Music Festival this weekend (although I still have to chase up a tent, and find somewhere that sells cider in cans, as glass is not allowed), and then on Monday I start presenting Breakfasters on RRR over the summer, through til the end of January. The early morning starts are going to be a challenge, but I'm really looking forward to presenting the show. I'll be taking a break from Smartarts during this time, but hopefully I'll be able to squeeze a few arts-related interviews into Breakfast! Today (Monday) I'm trying to catch up on a ...

Tuesday morning Monday night at about 9pm About 3/4 of an hour ago I was walking home down Gertrude Street, having just grabbed some fish and chips for dinner, when I saw a guy punching his girlfriend. I tried to intervene. He punched me in the face a couple of times. My dinner went all over the footpath. I'm sitting here now in something ressembling a state of shock, holding a packet of frozen peas to the right side of my face. I can't see out of my right eye cos the swelling's so bad. I'm gonna have a major black eye tomorrow. I've already reported the assault to the local cops. Fuck knows if anything is gonna come of it though. Tomorrow I'll post a pretty picture for you all of how my black eye has developed. If I had just kept walking I would have hated myself for not getting involved, but now I just feel sore and slightly stupid. Well, maybe sore, slightly stupid, but slightly proud that I tried to intervene as well... * * * Tuesday 29th I've upda...

What a week. Ack. I can barely bring myself to think about it, let alone write about it. Everything built towards Thursday: I watched Kubrick films, read a Kubrick bio, browsed Kubrick-related websites, all in preparation for 3RRR's three-hour outside broadcast live from the Australian Centre for the Moving Image on Thursday morning, where the exhibition Stanley Kubrick: Inside the mind of a visionary filmmaker opened that night. Got to ACMI early, chatting to various wonderful RRR staffers who were getting the equipment set up, running through the interview schedule with ACMI staff, and generally getting nervous about the show. To give you an idea of how seriously I was taking the broadcast, I scripted all of my intros and questions, which I usually just make up on the spot from a couple of brief notes. Not today though, I didn't want to leave things to chance (which meant that at least one of my interviews was a bit stiff, but more of that later). 9am rolled around, and we ...

Ok, the last few days have been more than a little tension-inducing. On Monday I found out that I had the opportunity of interviewing one of The Strokes, guitarist Nick Valensi, on Tuesday afternoon. Naturally I wasn't going to say no, even though it meant that most of Monday was a right off because I had to get public transport across town to South Melbourne, to the office of Sony BMG, so I could listen to eight of the 14 tracks off the band's forthcoming 3rd album First Impressions of Earth . (It's good, much better than Room On Fire - but more on that in a couple of weeks, once the embargo has been lifted.) Tuesday I did the interview, although as they were running a couple of hours behind schedule, the whole afternoon was a right off as well. (I'll play the interview on my RRR program Smartarts at the end of the year, or in early January; I'm not quite sure when, yet. I'll also print some of it in my MCV column, despite the fact that the idea of me doing ...

On Saturday, I: Woke up after a strange dream involving a talking dog which at one stage I was having a conversation with; later on I was the dog. I don't know what breed I was: probably a mongrel. Showered and dressed. Had a can of coke and a line of speed for breakfast, but not in that order. Ran out the front door. Caught the Brunswick Street tram into the city. Watched Miranda July's sublime debut feature film You and Me and Everyone We Know at the Kino cinema. Walked down Little Collins Street into Moviola, where I purchased Michael Herr's Kubrick , a memoir about writing the screenplay for Full Metal Jacket . Went back to the Kino and watched the Australian film Little Fish (starring Cate Blanchett), which I thought was strong but still under-developed. Walked home through the Fitzroy Gardens wishing it was autumn so there would be piles of leaves to kick through. Dropped in on a print-making exhibition at the Australian Print Workshop in Gertrude Street, Fitzroy. ...

This 1985 documentary, co-directed by Richard Lerner and Lewis MacAdams, is a wide-ranging tribute to the life and literature of Jack Kerouac, the tragic chronicler of the Beat Generation and author of the seminal novel On The Road . The Beat Generation was a group of writers and artists in post-WWII America who provocatively explored their disaffection with an increasingly homogenous and materialistic culture through often-autobiographical work. Kerouac (who died in 1969, aged 47) was widely perceived as the leader of the Beats, although as this documentary shows, he was ill equipped to handle the fame and infamy that the role demanded of him. From its opening scenes it is clear that What Happened To Kerouac? seeks to further enshrine Kerouac in the pantheon of literary saints rather than critically examine his reputation or the merits of his work. That in itself is no great sin. Less forgivable is the film’s inaccessibility: viewers who are not already intimately familiar with Kero...

Ang Lee's new film Brokeback Mountain just screened before a very respectful audience of film critics here in Melbourne, of whom I was one. I am delighted to report that the film was magnificent. Understated, subtle, rich in emotion, beautifully shot and superbly acted. It made me cry a couple of times. All the buzz about Ledger's performance as Ennis Del Mar is spot-on: he really does give a remarkable portrayal of a man who is so emotionally crippled, and frightened of himself and what his feelings mean, that he is unable to express the love he feels for Jack Twist (Jake Gyllenhaal). The expanded roles for the protagonists' wives (compared to their minor roles in Annie E Proulx's original short story) are well handled, so we feel compassion for them both, and gain a real sense of insight into their family lives. The sex scene in the tent between Jack and Ennis should satisfy everyone, homophiles and homophobes alike; although to my mind the second tent scene (I'l...

I have a grand total of $19.50 in my bank account, and apart from a little bit of money coming in from DJ'ing and sporadic, underpaid freelancing for the gay press, no income sources to speak off. Oddly enough, I don't feel at all concerned, perhaps because I know I can always get cash advances off my credit card, and also because the universe usually drops something in my lap at points like these. Then again, trusting in fate is not usually the wisest course to take. I need a job, and fast!

Well, not really. It wasn't like I was poised on the brink of suicide when a chance encounter with a Velvet Underground or Sex Pistols song renewed my optimism and sense of wonder about the world and made me coil up the rope or put down the razor blade. The title of today's post (which hopefully most of you will recognise as a paraphrased line from the Velvet's classic song 'Rock and Roll': if you didn't, you go buy a copy of the band's 1970 album Loaded immediately) seemed like a good intro to a brief discussion of some of the best gigs I've ever been to, which was inspired by my mention of seeing Nirvana live at the Palace in my 20 factoids tag response. So, in no special order (because how can you determine a scale of bliss?) here are a few of the most mind-blowing-or-expanding, moving, or simply thrilling gigs I've been to over the past 38 years of my colourful life to date. 1. P.J. Harvey live to air on 3RRR at the Rooftop Cafe, Monday 29th J...

Ok, so I've been tagged by Ekstasis , so I guess I better play... (Did you spot the carefully feigned reticence to hide my puppyish eagerness just then? Puppyish eagerness, you see, is not cool. Like, I'm cool? Yeah, right! See point 4, below.) Twenty things about me, hey? Hmmmmm. Let's see. 1. The only reason I went back to do Year Twelve in 1984 was cos I wanted to be in the school musical. The teachers had promised me that it would be Jesus Christ Superstar , and I figured I'd end up as either Christ or Judas, seeing as I'd had lead roles the two years previously (Joseph in Joseph and the Amazing Technicolour Dreamcoat with I was 15 and still a boy soprano; and Fagin in Oliver! the following year, by which stage I'd become a baritone). Then the bastard teachers decided to put on Bye Bye Birdie instead. I had to sing 'Put On A Happy Face.' Fuckers. 2. I read The Lord of the Rings 19 times between the ages of 14 and 21. Yes, I was a nerd. I played ...

Richard speaks with butoh performer Yumi Umiumare about culture, dance and gender politics. Tokyo-born butoh artist Yumi Umiumare first visited Australia while performing in the 1991 Melbourne International Arts Festival. Two years later she migrated to Melbourne and now lives here permanently: a decision motivated by personal as well as professional reasons. "I met a person I can stay with and start a relationship with, but also just the arts scene here for me is very liberating," Umiumare explains. "To see everyone in an audience respond to a performance so individually was quite refreshing for me, because in Japan the feedback you get is quite generic." Yumi’s dazzling performances, which fuse elements of traditional butoh with cabaret, are equally individual and have gained rave revues at festivals in Melbourne, Adelaide, Edinburgh, Copenhagen and Hong Kong. Her latest production, DasSHOKU Hora!! opens at the Malthouse Theatre next month. "People who have ...

Actress Caroline O’Connor talks with Richard Watts about evoking the spirit of Judy Garland . Agreeing to play the late Judy Garland in End of the Rainbow , the new play by English writer Peter Quilter, was not a decision that Caroline O’Connor made easily. "I didn’t immediately say yes when the role was offered to me," she says. "I did consider it for a little while, going ‘Oh my lord, what am I thinking?’ but the script was wonderful and original, and to have the chance to recreate such a glorious individual, such an amazing woman, I just thought it would be a fascinating project to take on." O’Connor is a veteran of stage and screen whose career encompasses Baz Luhrmann’s Moulin Rouge and an award-winning role in Joanna Murray-Smith’s one-woman play Bombshells . Despite a successful career spanning two decades and three continents, she admits to being in awe of Garland, the young star of MGM’s 1939 film, The Wizard of Oz . "I’d never sung anything that s...

The Last Romance – Arab Strap [Stomp] Glaswegian duo Arab Strap are an acquired taste. Their alcohol-sodden love songs are delivered in Aidan Moffat’s thick brogue, accompanied by Malcolm Middleton’s tense, minimal guitar hooks. While The Last Romance doesn’t quite lay the pair’s gloomy reputation to rest, a few rays of sunshine have been allowed to creep into the smoke-wreathed bar that Arab Strap call home. Overall The Last Romance is more compact and more energetic than its predecessors, and increased attention to the collaborative process has resulted in a new complexity. Despite these progressions, the sense of late night, last beer dramas still remains. "Sometimes there’s nothing sexier than knowing you’re doomed," groans Moffat on ‘Don’t Ask Me To Dance,’ one of the many Arab Strap songs proving that misery makes good company. 'Teardrops' – The Winter Ship [She Puts Out Records] Septet The Winter Ship, originally from country Victoria, are now firmly based in...

Ring Them Bells (Freedom has come & gone) - Thee Silver Mount Zion Memorial Orchestra & Tra La La Band Escape Pod - Decoder Ring Empty Beats for Lonely Hippo - Pasobionic National Holiday - The Herd Tomorrow Never Knows - The Beatles Get Off Of My Cloud - The Rolling Stones Sun in my Morning - St Etienne Come in out of the rain - Engineers Who Named the Days? - Arab Strap (live) There's Something at the Bottom of the Black Pool - Augie March War - Celebration Footy - Spiderbait Cody - Mogwai De Profundis - Dead Can Dance The Evening Gathering - Le Mystere des Voix Bulgares In the Dying Moments - SPK Come on Feel the Illinois - Sufjan Stevens Dayvan Cowboy - Boards of Canada God Bless Our Dead Marines - Thee Silver Mount Zion Memorial Orchestra & Tra La la Band The Final Arrears - Mull Historical Society Scientists - The Guild League

As promised, another photograph of me in a kilt, taken outside Bec & Bob's flat in Glasgow. The photographer was fellow Australian party animal and music fan, the lovely Ms. Nat Clark . We were supposed to be striking a 1970's male fashion catalogue pose which Henry (the best man, the dapper chap on the right) and Bob (the groom, centre) have pulled off with aplomb. Me, I went 'huh?', and hastily copied what Bob was doing, having just stepped out the front door and not quite knowing what was going on, which explains why I'm aping Bob's pose and don't have a suitably serious, impassive-male-model-type-expression on my face. A minute or two after this picture was taken Bob and Harry got into their chauffer-driven mini to head off to the church and Nat and I headed back into the flat. A minute after that there was a knock at the door. The mini wouldn't start, and I was needed to help push-start it. Weddings are mad! Happily though, everyone got to the...

Fjarkanistan - Amina Amy - Dirty Three A Time To Be Small - Interpo lMusic is my Radar - Blur Sister Jack - Spoon Milk Bottle Trio - Saint Etienne Modern Art - Art Brut What Did We Talk About (Before You Had Babies?) - Rob Clarkson Something in the Way - Nirvana In A Radio Show - Okkervil River Ballistics - The Great Fire of London I've Seen It All - Bjork w. Thom Yorke Don't Stop Now - Lemon Jelly Cool Kids Keep - The American Analogue Set The Chaos Offensive - Oceansize Come In Out of the Rain - Engineers Kennedy Killed the Hat - Buck 65 The Happy Sea - Colleen The Winter Hit Hard - Hood Dance Me In - Sons & Daughters

The last couple of months of my life have felt rather like being in a holding pattern above an airport, circling endlessly, lost in the clouds, waiting for clearance to start my descent from freefall into a new era of my life. I think yesterday the signal finally came through. I got a phonecall asking me to come in for a job interview on Thursday afternoon; a job I really want, and think I could do well. If I get it there's going to be a significant period of adjustment, as I haven't actually held down a fulltime job since I quit the public service in 1989. Yes, 1989. That's sixteen bloody years ago. Shit. Let me shake my head in disbelief and think about that for a moment. Sixteen...years? Wow. I feel suddenly old. Sixteen years of working in part time jobs (as a medical receptionist at the Victorian AIDS Council, as the Text Coordinator of the 2000 Next Wave Festival, and as the Artistic Director of the youth arts organisation Express Media). Sixteen years of falling in l...

I should be doing the dishes. I should be doing my laundry. I should be vaccuming the flat. I should be cleaning the bathroom. I should be reading media releases. I should be replying to e-mails from people who have requested an interview on my show. I should be listening critically to the pile of new release CD's on my loungeroom floor and making notes about them for my MCV music column and for next week's radio program. I should be joining a gym. I should be drinking less. I should be taking less speed. I should be eating better. I should be calling old friends. I should be making new friends. I should be finding a boyfriend. I should either tell D. how I feel about him (how I've felt about him for the last two years while being a shoulder for him to cry on when his emotionally and psychologically abusive boyfriend was getting too much) or just walk away. I should be rewriting my old novel. I should be starting a new novel. I should be writing new short stories. I should ...

For some reason - don't ask me why (who am I to explain my actions to you when I don't even understand them myself?) - I thought you might like to read a list of the songs that I played on my RRR arts program SmartArts today; lists apparently being popular things to write on your blog when you want to write something but are incapable of writing anything insightful, amusing or coherent. So, today's SmartArts playlist: Expect the Worst/Cos She's a Tourist - The Dears Small Change - Gersey These Wooden Ideas - Idlewild Been Caught Stealing - Jane's Addiction Rebellion (Lies) - The Arcade Fire The Mercy Seat - Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds Wolf on a String - Machine Translations Blood - Editors Evil and a Heathen - Franz Ferdinand Love in Fear - Constantines Spirit Ditties of No Tone - Deerhoof A Man Walks Into A Bar - Jens Leckman I'm the Luckiest Guy on the Lower East Side - The Magnetic Fields Small Memory - Mum Into the Light - Jah Wobble After D...

'Flying Lessons', a photogravure by Robert and Shana ParkeHarrison (USA) So it's just gone 10.44am on Saturday morning, and I'm sitting in front of the computer on the new ergonomic desk chair that I bought myself this week. My back will thank me for it, although my chiropractor will probably be sad cos it means she'll see less of me, which in my book is officially A GOOD THING (tm). Right now I should be working: specifically, I should be reading though, then scoring on their artistic merit, a big folder of Arts Victoria grant applications that's sitting on my kitchen table. Instead I've been successfully procrastinating for the last hour by adding a couple of recent articles to my blog, then scanning through blogs by friends to see what they've been up to, then clicking on their links to discover new blogs (such as Surlyboy 's blog: A Falling Out With The In Crowd . Love the name, liked the cynical humour of his posts). Having done all that, and ...